Dreams of a new career...

My friend refers to this place as "the retard museum"--far be it from me to otherwise characterize this latest shithole of wingnut amuricana (slogan: "Prepare to believe"). But, this flat-earth endeavor will forever be an artesian well of teh funny.

You say you wanna be a barista at the retard museum's "Noah's Café"? Here are the job requirements:

Requirements:

1. Passion for God


2. Must have a professional appearance


3. Be team oriented


4. Friendly, cheerful and sensitive to the needs of guests


5. Excellent customer service skills

And make sure you bring the following to your interview:

• Resume
• Salvation testimony
• Creation belief statement
• Confirmation of your agreement with the AiG Statement of Faith

Part of the "Statement of Faith" reads "The Holy Spirit lives and works in each believer to produce the fruits of righteousness"--in this case, the fruits of righteousness being hot cocoa, chai latté as well as a selection of biscotti and scones.

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